3 Simple Truths About Letting Go And Finding Yourself
By: Dominica Morris
I am back!!! After a few months of barely posting I’ve come back better and a lot more well rested. I needed this more than ever and it’s been nice to focus on other pursuits. As some of you may know I went through big changes last year. 2018 was truly a year of transformation and exploration for me, more than I could’ve ever imagined.
I had hit a major rut in my career in 2017, and it was having major effects on my health and overall happiness. I was writing about mindful living but felt more like a fraud. Being mindful was the least thing that I was, and I couldn’t keep up with the charade. So I decided to make a change. I quit my job as a behavior therapist, at the beginning of last year. It wasn’t easy making this change. Working as a behavior therapist was a life long dream of mine. I worked hard getting there dedicating, time, money and years of education towards this dream. I thought I knew what I wanted, but soon after working in the field I got burned out. I worked with so many amazing families and children, but the constant demands of the job and seeing children lose health insurance that could help them get the care they so desperately needed, made the job extremely exhausting. My immediate family was upset that I quit. They felt like I was giving up on a life long dream, they told me that I had changed, that I needed to suck it up, others said that my husband was to blame that he had talked me out of my dream. Instead of seeing my exhaustion, bruises, tired, and sick body, they decided to make me feel even worse.
This made me feel even more like a failure. It took a while for me to let go of this thought. Luckily for me Caleb, my husband, was very understanding and helped me work through this change. Although I felt bad leaving my career behind and leaving the children that I cared for, I knew that I had to make this change for myself. After a few months of making sure that my clients could easily transition to another therapist, I decided to take the plunge and leave everything I’ve worked for behind. I’m so happy that I did, because along the way I learned so much about myself. I’m writing this because if you’re going through the same thing as I did, I want you to know these simple truths that I learned on this journey and maybe they too can help you.
Yes we hear this all the time. Yet in a world where the “hustle hard” mentality is so prevalent, it’s so easy to forget this. I know I did. I had dedicated years of my life pursuing a career that I thought would give me everything that I needed in life, and yet when I achieved it and realized it wasn’t all it was meant to be I was lost. I had lost myself in the “hustle”. I had dedicated years of my life on this one dream and forgot to focus on the things that truly brought me joy. I believed that if I reached my goal of becoming a behavior therapist that I would be fulfilled, but lost sight of what truly mattered. Don’t ever become so consumed in pursuing your career that you lose yourself.
My parents and family members wanted me to continue to pursue this path that I forged. They believed that I was wasting all of the hard work I had done to get to where I was. They didn’t understand that I was exhausted and burned out. Whenever I tried to explain, it fell on deaf ears, because they had a dream for me that they wanted. Nothing that I said mattered, and because I value their opinions I stayed in a career that caused me a great amount of anxiety, heartbreak, and stress. When I finally decided to listen to my heart, as cheesy as that may sound, I felt like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Yes, I disappointed people I cared for, but they eventually came around once they realized how much happier I was.
Letting go of my career was life changing. I was so scared of the unknown, but once I let go, everything fell into place. I started a new career in marketing and content creation, I’ve been able to help my husband grow his business and see it grow bigger than we could’ve ever imagined, I’ve traveled the world, and best of all I got to find myself. Once I had all this free time I was able to get back into meditating, I started drawing and creating art again, even painting two large murals with Caleb. I’ve been teaching myself photography on a DSLR, and I’m absolutely loving it. It’s strange but I’ve been finding a side of myself that I haven’t seen since I’ve been a kid and it’s wonderful.
I won’t say that everything has been rainbows and butterflies. Yes, there were hard times and even days where I wondered if I had made the right decision. Relying on Caleb to foot most of the bills was hard beginning, since I had been independent for so long and asking someone to take over and help just isn’t me. But I know that if I had not taken the plunge, I would be less happy and myself, and I don’t ever want to be in that place again. So if you’re ever in this same exact spot I was in, I hope that some of this advice will help you make the right decisions that will help you lead a more fulfilled, happy, and authentic life.